For years, I dreaded autumn.

It was the time my anxiety used to flare up every single year, without fail. The shorter days, the darker evenings, even the smell of cold air would make me tense before anything had even happened.

I remember thinking, “Here we go again.”

Until one year… nothing happened.

And in that moment, I saw something I’d never seen before - the “trigger” wasn’t the season at all. It was my thinking about the season.

The Brain’s Habit of Joining Dots

Our minds are clever. They love patterns. When we’ve struggled in a certain situation before, the brain says, “Oh! I recognise this - let’s protect you!”

So when work got busier, nights got darker, or Christmas plans started piling in, my mind linked all of it to “this is the time you fall apart.”

Completely innocently, my brain would try to keep me safe. But what it actually did was keep the fear alive.

Your brain is doing its best - it’s just not always right.

A New Experience Is Always Possible

One summer when anxiety appeared out of nowhere, it actually helped me see something powerful:
The calendar, the weather, even old memories have no power to create new feelings today - only thought does.

Each moment is new.

Just because anxiety visited last October doesn’t mean it was booked again this one.

The past doesn’t hold a remote control for your present, unless you hand it the batteries.

Don’t Fight the Story - See Through It

It’s tempting to try to reframe, resist, or prove to ourselves that we’re fine.

But true freedom comes when we stop treating triggers as problems to fix and start seeing them as thoughts passing through. The moment we see that, something softens.

We don’t have to brace or analyse or plan our way out of anxiety - because there’s nothing in the outside world to fight against.

A Simple Way to Notice It

Next time you feel “triggered,” try this:

Pause.
Feel your feet on the floor. Notice the pull of gravity.
Name it kindly.
“Oh, my brain’s connecting old dots again.”
Wait.
Let the wave roll through. It always does.
Ask: “What do I actually feel now?” - not what I remember feeling before.
That tiny pause invites wisdom back in.

Freedom Is Found in Freshness

We can’t stop thoughts appearing, but we can stop believing the recycled ones. Life becomes lighter when we see that every moment is brand new, untouched by the past unless we drag it in.

When you catch yourself saying “this always happens to me,” that’s your cue to pause and remember:
This moment has never happened before.

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